Earlier I caught half of a Molyneux podcast (#5558) and he was talking about the small percentage of people that actually really apply themselves in therapy and the self-knowledge process. This has also born out, in my experience. One of the difference makers that I see for those who do make a lot of progress in this regard is people who have a supporting and activated spouse. Not only do you get double the growth with a significant other, the synergy can really kick off to new levels if the other person is a dedicated and devoted student.
I always urge people to work as hard on themselves as possible BEFORE they have children as even one child is a massive emotional and intellectual investment. For men, the time you have to spend going out and earning usually goes up, at least when you're young. For women, you are often low on sleep, pregnant again, or homemaking, which is no small chore and no easy task.
Another factor that works in people's favors is total commitment and focus. To get a job done right, you have to excavate your soul like your life depends on it. I continue to keep this ethic in my own life for a number of reasons. I have a highly competitive nature. I simply have a natural knack for the work. And I am often dissatisfied with my own performance once I've uncovered a new standard, which is happening on a nearly daily basis.
Getting to the golden shores of sanity is a ton of work, especially in the beginning. And getting there is not a guarantee of staying. People drift in and out. People make mistakes and then decide not to humble themselves and figure out why. The outside world of addiction, status, and evil against children is constantly putting pressure on people to develop addictions, worries, and conflicts with other sane people.